How Do You Make Me Half of Anything When I’m a Whole Person?

[My name is] Leota Lynne Crockett (1), named after my dad’s mom. Didn’t make me thrilled, that’s why I’m Lynne. But I love my grandma dearly, just don’t care for that name.  [Growing up over North] was wonderful. No problems, it was a multinational neighborhood. Young, old, Black, White, Native, Mexican, mixed couples. Everything. Kind of like it is now. Except they weren’t all from different states. They were all from here. So, they didn’t bring their problems from their states to our state. So, it was pretty homogenous. Everybody got along. I had friends that looked like… Everything. Filipino, Black, White, Jewish. [It was a] great place to grow up. It was a safe place to grow up. Northside for life.

North on Hennepin across 4th.
1953 photo from the MN Streetcar Museum

It was a village. No one told them they needed to be a village. My grandma knew lots of people, my dad knew lots of people. They knew our family, so if I went down to the park and was clownin’ someone would be like “I’ma call your grandma”. You walk to school and someone’s being vulgar, the lady on the porch goes, “You want me to call your grandma?” They really watched out if someone was bothering you. They’d go outside and go, “okay you can go on and leave them alone. Come on baby, come in here.” It really was a village and it wasn’t a movement, it’s just how people were. They just took care of each other. I didn’t know we were poor. I thought we had everything that we needed. My dad flooded the backyard in the winter so we could ice skate. We had a swing set, we had friends, we played baseball, and participated in sports at the park, and took dance lessons at Phillis Wheatley (2). I don’t think you ever know you're poor until someone tells you you are. I think you’re just kind of used to whatever it is you had is what you had, until you get out into the world and see what other what other people have. And since everybody around us pretty much had the same thing that we have, you know, there was nothing to be jealous of. It wasn’t about the money. It was about people caring about other people.

[When] I was ten-years-old, they were hanging people in the South. One of my best girl friends lived about four, five doors down. Her mom was outside working the yard, and I just said her about it. “What do you think about that hanging people stuff?” She’s like, “It’s terrible” and I said, “So if I was there, they wouldn’t know what to do with me huh?” and she said, “Oh yeah they would, they’d hang you.” [So I said] “I’m ten-years-old, why would you hang me?” “Because your dad is black. So if you were down there they’d hang you too.” I went home and talked to my dad about that, and he told me there were a lot of ignorant people in the world. That was a wake up call. When I was a teenager, in my late teens, was apart of a revolutionary people, I supported the Black Panthers (3). I was apart of the Republic of New Afrika (4). That was my little lalaland coming to an end then. There were things I probably wasn’t invited to, that were things the other white kids were invited to. Cause I never been “I’m black I'm black and I don’t want nothing to do with nobody else.” I usually could get along with everybody.  

[In] 1979, while I was at the U, they burnt a cross in our yard ‘cause they didn’t like the fact that there was a black family on their block. In 1982, [at] the University of Minnesota. One of my classmates said she wasn’t gonna make it to class cause she didn’t have a babysitter, and it was Spring break. So I told her,  “well, my kids can watch your kids is that gonna be a problem? My kids are teenagers you know” and she was like, “really?” and I said “yeah, it’ll be a cultural experience for them.” And she said “what do you mean?” I said “it’ll give them some time to be around some African Americans.” [She] got her stuff together, put it under her arm, got up and left the table. Never spoke to me again. I’ve overcome those barriers, because I’m not gonna let anybody limit me or decide for me who I am. I know who I am. I believe that this mixer makes me who I am, makes me have a perspective that is broader than most people have, because they only see things through their own lense and the filters that are over here, that tell you who you can like and who you can’t like.

Left to right: Robin, Mamie, Michael

People learn stuff from me; because they think black people think like this, but we don’t. Actually we think that’s very offensive. But, nobody knows it because you don’t talk to black people to ask them, you’re scared to have those conversations. I’ve had my feelings hurt and have people say things about black people, and I go, “Really? That’s not how we feel at all.” And they go, “what?” and I said, “Did you know I’m Black?” and they go, “get outta here, you’re kidding!” And I said “is that usually something people usually kid about?” “Oh! I’m so sorry! You know some of my best friends are black.” And I say, “Mm, some of my best friends are white. Didn’t change what you just said.” I watched Michael (5) be treated different than Robin (6). I would send Michael into the store, and had to go in there and say, “and when was you gonna serve him?” Never had that problem with Robin. But because he was darker, he got treated different. Did I say revolutionary? Black Panther, that ain’t gonna work, we gonna have a problem in the store. You're mistreating my black child, is that what you’re doing? Because he’s black, because he’s brown? You’re not waiting on him? I am very confirmed in my blackness, the world will not let me be anything else. White people won’t let me be more white. Black people don’t really wanna make me black.

So we’re kind of in this middle land where you’re kind of either or. You’re not really us so it don’t count. [During the] BET Awards, they said “how about that and nobody black won.” And someone said “well John Legend won” and the guy goes, “well that doesn't count, he’s only half black.” And I always wonder when they say that, which half would that be? Is that like my right side? Is that from my waist up? Waist down? How do you make me half anything when I’m a whole person? Fortunately for most people you don’t know what I am when you see me. So was a good chance to open your mouth and make a mistake. Race is one of the biggest problems we fail to overcome. I don’t think that we really confront our own racism and not necessarily because we’re racist, but because we aren’t taught things, we stereotype people just by looking at them. But people look at you and stereotype you. I grew up [wanting to] be somebody who made a difference. I wanted to be a lawyer, to help poor people who couldn’t afford one. At the U, I had a black, male counselor working with me. He asked me what I wanted to do, and I told him, “I wanna get a law degree” and he went, “Ha! You gotta be kidding. I can’t even get into law school.” What that got to do with me? But think, there are counselors that are sitting there, who are suppose to be helping you sign up for school; to help you chase your dream and telling you, “you can’t--I couldn’t do that, you can’t do that.” I am divergent. I don’t stay in line, I don’t follow the leader, I don’t stay in my place. But the only people that are going to make a change in this world are people who are divergent. Cause if you are just part of the get along gang, or the get along posse then someone else is known to tell us how to think. You just do what I say. You just listen to me.

Footnotes:

1. Born October 14, 1944 to Jerome Theodore Crockett and Mamie Sophronia Johnson, an interracial couple.
2. Phillis Wheatley is a community center located at 1301 N 10th Ave. Minneapolis, MN Named after Phillis Wheatley, the first published African-American female poet
3. The Black Panther Party or BPP (originally the Black Panther Party for Self-Defense) was a revolutionary black nationalist and socialist organization active in the United States from 1966 until 1982
4. The Republic of New Afrika (RNA) was founded in 1968 as an American social movement based in Black Nationalism
5. Michael Crockett, born March 8, 1963. The first born son to Lynne.
6. Robin Crockett, born April 25th, 1961. The first born daughter to Lynne.

Story Facilitators:
Ellie Haramaras, Denise Reyes, Thidasavanh Crockett